Pride and Prejudice - a query

Jessica Sinsheimer and Shannon Alexander posted my "query" for Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice (love that book!!) for the "Query Ball" they're holding on tumblr! You can find my query and their responses here. It was amazingly difficult to write. Such a classic book with such special relationships--I didn't want to get it wrong, but they assured everyone that it was a learning experience, so flaws were welcome.

In an attempt to help give advice about queries, they have collected many contributions and have posted feedback for the queriers. Mine was posted today and they gave me their opinions about what I wrote! You can read what they put, great advice, especially about the final sections of the query.

I sent mine--gulp! And waited, hoping to get a critique. And I did! Yeah!!!!

Thanks to Jessica and Shannon for your time. It's been fun to read the queries and your humorous and thoughtful responses!



Here is my query!

Elizabeth Bennet has always thought she was a good judge of character…until she meets HIM. Mr. Darcy seems to be a pine tree of a person, all height and sharp needles.

Mr. Darcy is staying in the village for the summer, and despite having 10,000 pounds a year and an estate the size of which should make a girl’s head spin, Elizabeth finds him to be the most unpleasant of companions: fully aloof at parties, arrogant at every third conversation, and taciturn at all the others.

She also overhears him insulting her! So, when Darcy asks her to dance, Elizabeth thinks he’s being patronizing. But then he takes such concern over her dear sister Jane who’s fallen ill, Elizabeth can’t help but wonder who has tipped the world on its axis.

It’s also strange that his good friend, Mr. Bingley, with whom dear Jane is falling in love, is possibly the loveliest gentleman they have ever met, and not too inept on the dance floor either. Thanks to his 5,000 pounds a year, the young ladies’ mother is beside herself that Bingley is showering Jane with attention.

But that Mr. Darcy! He is Mr. Bingley’s exact opposite in every way. If arrogance had a name it would be D-a-r-c-y.

Of course that’s before it all begins to change…

If she refuses to listen, Elizabeth may still have her pride. If she gives it up, she might have a future.

At 100,000 words, PRIDE AND PREJUDICE reveals a world where marriage is for money and name is equivalent to status, yet one woman is fortunate to find true love in the most unexpected of places.

Thank you sincerely for your time!